Thursday, 16 October 2008

Election Special #2 - Would Barak Obama Be Good For Internet Poker?

In the second of our exclusive online poker news election specials, Melted Felt is pleased to clear up a mystery for poker playing voters throughout the US... what the fu(k is Barak Obama's stance on Online Poker anyway??

Of course, as usual when an election approaches, the candidates themselves get a little busy shaking hands (with other people, not just shaking their own hands around) and throwing insults.

Fortunately, the Melted Felt mole managed to penetrate deep within the Obama press room heirarchy and sent us the following concise report on exactly what Barak stands for:

- That online poker is undoubtedly a game of skill in which the experts have a huge edge over the fish, and thus should be immediately banned as gambling.

- That poker companies should be regulated and welcomed into the taxation system where they would contribute to the wider economy, and thus should be immediately banned, blocked and their CEOs chemically castrated.

- That playing poker online is part of every American's constitutional right to spend their money on whatever liesure activities they wish, thus online poker should be banned immediately.

- Concerned parents should definitely vote for Obama, as he plans to provide an on-call baby sitting service for when you go deep in a tournament and the little brats start screaming, or something.

- Other concerned parents should also vote for Obama, since under his presidency, anyone caught playing poker online will be sent to boot camp for correctional training, bible reading lessons and coaching in the dangers of playing easily dominated hands in early position.

Well, that has clarified that then (maybe).


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