Tuesday, 6 January 2009

Laptop Screens Look Great In Paradise

In a sensationally shocking story from the paradise resort of the Atlantis Casino - Bahamas - Melted Felt bring you news of just how much better a full 16 hour online tournament schedule looks when in one of the worlds top resorts.

Yes, as many of Poker Stars finest online MTT players converge on the carribean island for the PCA - some of them are experiencing the pure unadulterated joy of daily cleaning service, pay as you watch porn on TV and an en-suite bathroom which completely does away with the need to keep a piss-cup under the desk to avoid missing a single hand.

On strict condition of anonymity we spoke to 'Paul' from Boston, who busted out of the main event early after realising he was shit at poker and was determined to make the most of his stay in Paradise. We asked him which of the features of the exotic resort he was enjoying the most...

"Wow man" Paul started, "It is like, amazing, you know? truly paradise here... I have been walking around with no socks on just to feel the luxuary of the carpets between hands" he continued before a hand in the $5 rebuy took his attention for a few minutes "You can, like, call room service whenever you want to bring you food and stuff, I got them here to bring me 17 cans of red-bull before starting my 19 hour daily tournament schedule".

We then asked Paul whether he intended to take advantage of the many attractions which make the Atlantis resort famed around the world. "Sure, I aleady clicked onto the free wireless connection" he replied, "And used the shoe-shine machine twice yesterday - wanna free shower-cap?"

Paul had to go at this point, assuring us that he planned to at least have a look at that tube-through-a-shark-tank thingy, luckily the likes of Cardplayer were providing plently of live updates via the internet... which did away with the need to actually leave his room for the time being.


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