Monday, 25 May 2009

Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker Room Reviewed

Players looking for a great place to play online poker should really check out Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker today. With some of the easiest online poker games as well as a 100% to $500 sign-up bonus with Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker Bonus Code JERK500 - you'll be showing big profits from the virtual felt in no time at all. Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker features many games in addition to the usual Texas Holdem and is a member of the trusted Meat-Products poker network, a group of premier poker sites who pool their players for a better meat-based gaming experience. This review of Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker gives you all the information you need to know and - as a one off special - looks exactly the fucking same as every other online poker site review you will ever read.

Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker Bonuses

You are never far away from an ultra slow-clearing bonus at Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker, who really know how to look after their regular players. Use Jack Links Beef Jerky Bonus Code JERK500 when you sign-up to grab your 100% bonus, you only need 12 points for each bonus dollar and will regret not going through a rakeback provider for the rest of your 6 months donating cash at the tables before deciding that you are good but unlucky and getting into Warcraft instead. Other promotions include freerolls with miniscule prize pools and 1000's of 12 year old opponents, and a bad beat jackpot which takes so much in rake that the site owners choke on their jerky with laughter whenever some dumb fvck plays at those tables.

Jack Links Beef jerky Poker Game Selection

Most of the tables at Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker are mind-numbingly small stakes Texas Holdem games, with an average of 7 players to each flop, and a big red 'check-call all the way to the river then push all-in' button on the software so you can be guaranteed to be banging your head against a brick wall soon. For those who prefer to overplay A-A-x-x hands there is sometimes half a table of pot limit Omaha nits waiting for the stray drunk newbie to donate their stack. Jack Links have replaced the HORSE games with their own BEEF, comprising Badugi, Eight or Better Stud, Eight or Better Omaha and Frazz, a special version of Stud high in which half the field still thinks it is playing Razz and 4 bets 4th street with 2-4-5-7 rainbow.

For tournament fans there are a huge selection of MTTs including the showcase 'Sunday Jerk', a $200+$15 event which has a guaranteed prize pool of $200. SNG fans are well catered for too, though the ability to multi-table is somewhat curtailed by the fact that there are only ever 7 players online and they are all eagerly waiting to comment on *your* sharkscope graph.

Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker Software Client

Fortunately the software used by Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker was designed by poker professionals - with the poker players firmly in mind. What you will notice immediately from the client is how much these professionals detested those other players, and how far they went out of their way to make the client as resource-intensive on your computer as possible while supplying the least user-friendly gaming experience. One notable feature is the inclusion of worldwide wholesale meat prices in the top left hand corner - oh and and big red buttons saying deposit now on every fucking page. In order to keep up with rival networks, Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker have added a special feature which pretends to install updates for 10 minutes every time you log-on - whether there are any updates or not.

Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker Summary

We love the 'gold cow' promotion, the fact that customer services dont speak English and the complete lack of suitable deposit options at Jack links. However, they are giving us $150 per player we send them - so fuck ethics, time to talk them up a bit. Join my brother, sister, dog, 3 mates from footy and 167 (and counting) Chinese individuals who only happen to have the same IP address by chance at Jack Links Beef Jerky Poker today. Remember to use Jack Links Beef Jerky Bonus Code JERK500 when you register to claim your ultra-slow clearing bonus. Click now to check out Jack Links for yourself and regret not going through a rakeback provider for years to come!

MF

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