Wednesday, 22 July 2009

National Poker Week Insights

Yes, Dear Melted Felt readers, it is National Poker Week this week - that special time in the poker year where everyone who is into poker tells
each other that it is national poker week this week, and nobody else gives a sh1t. Rather than taking the high-road of Chairmen, Senators and the
entirely free initiatives the PPA are spending a baffling amount of the funds they raise on... we will today look to the common player, the ordinary poker fan and their friends and relations to ask the question - 'What Does National Poker Week Mean To You?'

Starting in Iowa where we meet John, Sally, Freddie, Sue and Les in a downtown bar waiting for the first of several bands to play. John took the lead in the discussion, "Our friend Ron finally managed to convince us that poker is actually not gambling at all this week!!", John shouted over the booming music, "Like, we were thinking, 'yeah man' gambling problem', but it turns out Ron was simply making good decisions in the mathematical sense all along and profiting from the mistakes of his opponents over time", John got momentariliy distracted by a blonde in a tight dress squeezing past before continuing, "we sure were wrong on that front!". At this point Sally joined the conversation, "yeah, it is comforting to know that Ron does not sit in a darkened room every night never coming out and not having had a girlfriend in 3 years because of gambling - of course we are worried that he is pale, skinny, unheathy and spends his entire life alone - but apparently his forum buddies think he is 'balla'"

Next to New Jersey, where we get to speak to Mike's mom! Another great success of National Poker Week is that this particular Mom has stopped worrying about the effects of poker playing on her son, and has even condoned for the first time his entry into a 8000 player tournament on Pokerstars after seeing John Pappas articulately defend the rights of Americans to play. 11 year old Mickey will now be able to shoot for the first prize of $9 - as long as the tournament does not run over his 8:00PM bedtime, apparently Mike has a side-bet for a dime with his 8-year old brother Scott that he can call at last 5 other players 'retarded' during the tourney.

Finally we pop to Alaska where Jeff (not his real name) is on a personal mission to maintain his rights as an American citizen to 12 table 25NL 6 hours a day and live off of the rakeback at home with his parents. Jeff angrily stated that his personal freedoms were on the line and that his cause was just as important on a global scale as abolishing Apartied, the fight against childhood malaria and democracy in Myanmar... when we mentioned that regulation meant he could be taxed in the same way as any other professional Jeff paled a little, mumbled something about 'an appointment' and then wandered off looking slightly confused.

Happy National Poker Week to you all!!


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