Monday, 16 November 2009

Who Is Isildur1? Isildur1's True Identity Revealed!!

Scooptastic news this morning, dear Melted Felt readers - as we stop the collective poker itch which is the mystery surrounding the true identity of Isildur1, who has been completely and utterly owning new Team Full Tilt member Tom 'Durrrr' Dwan on the high stakes tables recently as well as taking the odd pot from twin Tilt baldies Antonius and Hansen...

Who is Isildur1? I hear you collectively ask as he scoops yet another pot to take his total vs Dwan to over $4 million... all we know for sure so far is that this player comes from Sweden, the country that famously supplied the steel which helped build the Nazi war machine during World War while pretending to be 'neutral'.

Yes dear readers, it was Benny from ABBA all along. Benny Andersson is in fact famous for not being the son of Alfred Nobel - originator of the prizes Sweden give out every year to hide the fact that they have actually done fuck all of anything during their 1000's of years of history* (*except for helping build the Nazi war machine of course.)

The chirpy songsmith, who has irritated generations of wedding guests with such hits as Money Money Money and Dancing Queen first took an interest in online poker after realizing he lived somewhere where it was completely dark 22 hours a day for 11 months of the year. Though his initial foray onto the tables was unsuccessful, success soon came his way after he had his 'fold' button replaced with the words 'Danish Beer Is Just So Much Better'

As long as it stops a comeback tour, eh?


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