Friday, 18 December 2009

Playing In The Name Of!

As the UK grinds to it's usual fearful winter halt under 3 millimeters of powdery snow we bring you news that the Brits are busy fighting the establishment this holiday season... Sick of having prime-time TV talent shows provide the light-pop drivel of the Christmas chart-toppers... a Facebook campaign to get Rage Against The Machine to the number one spot looks like succeeding this time - one in the eye for, erm, well, nobody much really - but hey, it sounds like fun.

So, dear Melted Felt readers, this leads us to the question of who (or what?) is the Online Poker 'establishment' and how might we rebel against it - should we so desire? We could make calls 2% lighter than true ev for 'meta game purposes' against known regs with aggression factors more than 12% above ours - but that just does not feel like the true spirit of rebellion to me... we could use pics of Che Guevara as our Stars icon pics... but a random picture of a pen1s would probably be a less sad choice.

No, when it comes to poker - you have to ask yourself... who are you playing in the name of? Let us start with a lyrical journey into the minds of the forum message savages who are the sheep of 2+2... with our own Melted Felt potential seasonal chart-topper... set to the music of you know who:

Playing In The Name

Playing in the name of!
Some of those that cuss fishes are the same that limp aces
Some of those that cuss fishes are the same that limp aces
Some of those that cuss fishes are the same that limp aces
Some of those that cuss fishes are the same that limp aces
Huh!

Playing in the name of!
Playing in the name of

And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya

Those that raised are justified, for tracking the stats, they're the grinding pros
You justify those that raised by 3 betting light, they're the grinding pros
Those that raised are justified, for tracking the stats, they're the grinding pros
You justify those that raised by 3 betting light, they're the grinding pros

Some of those that play tourneys are the same that shove aces
Some of those that play tourneys are the same that shove aces
Some of those that play tourneys are the same that shove aces
Some of those that play tourneys are the same that shove aces
Uggh!

Playing in the name of!
Playing in the name of

And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya
And now you bet what they told ya, now your under control
And now you bet what they told ya, now your under control
And now you bet what they told ya, now your under control
And now you bet what they told ya, now your under control

Those that raised are justified, for tilting their foes, they're the grinding pros
You justify those that raised with the sharkcope graph on a downward path
Those that raised are justified, for tilting their foes, they're the grinding pros
You justify those that raised with the sharkcope graph on a downward path

Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me!
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me!
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me!
Fvck you, I won't play how you tell me!
Online Poker is fvking rigged!
Motherfvcker!
Uggh!



MF


PS: If you are from the UK, sign-up now and go download the tune for xmas number 1! Go to facebook and search 'Rage against the machine for xmas number 1' you can't miss it!

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