Thursday, 9 December 2010

Got A Great New Job This Week… Help Required.

It is not often, dear Melted Felt readers, that I call on you for help – today I must do just that. Blogging twisted versions of the poker news lead me to an opening, a contact if you like… seeing a man about a dog with a briefcase sort of a thing….Well, one thing came to another, a nod being as good as a wink to a blind bat, and I found myself on the telephone to none other than the chief exec of the world’s biggest poker site –

You see, I heard there was a ‘lill job going… that all I had to do was convince them I was a Swedish nosebleed stakes poker pro and *wham* the big piles of cash and equally juicy sponsorships would be mine all mine.

It started easily enough, all they wanted to do was test my Swedish credentials. Fortunately I had taken a scene of the Chef from the Muppet Show and edited out all of those squarks when he hits a chicken… the ol-be-bol-le-wol-de-sol-bork-bork-bork was more than enough to get the barriers down and the negotiations begin.

After answering several quick-fire questions on the history of Abba the subject of my hospitality requirements when traveling came up… thinking fast I absolutely insisted on Ikea furniture being shipped (and pre-assembled) to the hotel in advance of every trip. A few poker questions came up, and ‘all-in’ seemed to be the right answer every time.

So, it all sounds good, I have a multi-million sponsorship, the screen name Isildur1 and I’ll be representing Pokerstars at all of the major events from now on.

Just one problem, the one I opened the post with and could do with your assistance on… how actually do you win at Poker? I did not want to stress anyone here, only I have these 250 hand high stakes challenge things starting in just over a week, and my break-even record in the $5 SNGs probably is not enough to get me though... any ideas?

MF (aka Isildur1)

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