Wednesday, 23 March 2011

Cake Sale Shocker Sows The Seeds Of Doubt In Players Minds…

Shocking news is the bread and butter of the sub-niche of funny poker blogs which includes the 'used to be funny' space dominated by Melted Felt, dear readers – and it does not get any more shocking than the rumored sale of Cake Poker.

If ‘inside sources’ even more reliable than the babbling head-voices we use here are to be believed, Poker Listings, the super-affiliates who constantly take the p1ss out of Google with their (alleged!) aggressive link buying antics are about to close the deal to buy Cake.

The sale itself is not really the problem, at least according to the forums and blogs debating the news.

The problem people seem to have is that Poker Listings have suddenly made Cake their top rated poker site, giving them a hefty 8.2 out of 10 – a score which does not quite match up with peoples experience of this site being a little bit, well, sh1t. They gave themselves a big bonus offer too just to add Cake eating insult to the masses of breadless revolutionaries...

Indignation has been expressed.

Blood has boiled.

Spleens worldwide have been thoroughly vented.

How the hell could they give Cake 8.2 / 10??!

Now, hopefully, gentle Melted Felt readers, you are sitting comfortably and in a carefree, calm and vaguely jolly mood today – because I have some shocking and potentially stressful news for you.

This might not be the first time a business has rated a product or service based on how much they get paid and not only its inherent qualities.

I know, I know, difficult to imagine how it could be true. Bear with me here...

You see, when you find that random poker strategy site which goes on and on about how DogsTesties Poker dawt com is the most brilliant site to play at in the whole fvucking world ever, it might be the case that the $200 per player sent has *ahem* ‘persuaded’ the author a little tiny bit more than the quality of the games… When you see Stars disappearing down the list of ‘best sites’ it might be the fact that they do not actually need to pay affiliates to send them players who will end up there soon enough anyway… rather than something inherently bad about the site.

I understand that some readers will be a little perturbed at this point and so will spare you the examples from finance, retail, from travel and hospitality, from catering and from auto… etc

What is it with all the forum based faux-shock out there? Are people offended that Listings were a little too obvious? They crossed some imaginary don't rub it in my fvucking face please line? Are there people around who are genuinely naïve enough to believe that every ‘rating’ on every website was on the straight and narrow? Is the poker news so dull these days that any old excuse for a little rage is good enough?


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