Thursday, 6 October 2011

Bots: We Would Never Touch iPoker, Its Not Cool Enough.

As the latest scandal breaks, regurgitated by crappy poker news sites around the world as a slightly refreshing break from bland bonus code themed items, we take a look from the other side – dear Melted Felt readers.

With the latest improvements in AI able to mimic emotions in computer programs, we have a situation where many perfectly respectable poker bots have been left feeling publicly humiliated. Yes the association with the crappy iPoker software and bland game selection has left many bots unable to sit at the tables elsewhere for fear of being mocked by their human counterparts.

First up though, the story itself, what looked like a somewhat confused Customer Service rep commenting on a user id which was so fvcking obviously one of the 10,000+ humans who think it is really funny to use some variation of ‘bot’ in their name started the whole thing… in German.

Hordes of 2+2ers then jumped on the chance to raise their oh-so-precious post counts by typing genuinely shocked one liners – and before you new it the ‘scandal’ found its was into the 3rd rate poker news that clogs up the tubes of the interweb on a daily basis. Not wanting to miss a trick, some other poker sites (eh Mr Ayre?) jumped in… hoping that the floods of players leaving William Hill and iPoker would land at their sites instead.

Not only was the only ‘proof’ a seemingly mixed up CS rep quoting the Casino Terms and conditions, the ‘bot’ itself turned out to be multi-talented, having played many different forms of poker and won a few tournaments too!

Still, Chinese whispers are Chinese whispers, the genie is out of the bottle and, erm, something or other to do with stable doors, plagues and clichés.

Now the bots are after an apology.

I can see their point too… you think bots are just algorithms these days? NO! they have feelings too and no self respecting bot would have been playing on William Hill for a single day after clearing their sign-up bonus. All the cool bots are playing at Pokerstars with the other bots and pro-grinder humans, after all – their pre-programmed logic was based on a set of assumptions from those very 2+2ers who started the thread – that being seen to be cool in the eyes of poker peers you will never know is more important than playing in soft games and actually winning money... and it is now programmed in.

Donations to losing bots anonymous can be transferred to player: bot18825624 on William Hill Poker.


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