Sunday, 1 January 2012

Melted Felt Poker Predictions 2011

With every blog and it’s dog doing their predictions for 2012 at the moment, I thought it was time for Melted Felt to go out on a limb. You see, we did not get to be the world’s leading poker satire blog which officially used to be funny for no good reasons. We got there by once being funny, no, erm, hold on, I mean we go there by being DIFFERENT, that was it DIFFERENT.

So, while the boring bloggers do there 2012 poker predictions… I’m going to really push the boat out today – and give you my poker predictions for 2011. Do not forget to come back in a years time to see how my predictions panned out.

2011 Poker Predictions 1 – Legal Troubles Ahead

This is going to sound crazy, being written in January and all – however I think that there could be trouble ahead in the USA. My prediction is that online poker will appear to be going just great for US players – with thousands more players dropping out of college to enjoy the ‘freedom’ to sit in a dark room clicking a mouse while their friends leave their lives one by one and go on to have fulfilling careers, beautiful families and Labradors.

I’m sticking my neck on the line and plumping for April here – some kind of legal issues will force the big sites to immediately close and leave the US. No more Pokerstars or Full Tilt and / Absolute might well close. Phew, bit of an ‘out there’ prediction I know – let us wait and see if I am right.

2011 Poker Predictions 2 – Record WSOP, Foreign Winner

With online poker decimated, you might think that the annual World Series in Las Vegas would drop in popularity… especially with the ‘supersatellites’ gone. I’m going to predict the opposite for 2011… and suggest that we will see record number of players, since nobody will really know what to do with their remaining poker bankroll.

Even with US players in mass-attendance – poker around the world is maturing fast. Because of this I think we might see a foreign winner of the biggest event of all. In fact if anyone would like to give me odds on this being a German, I’d accept the wager… any takers?

2011 Poker Predictions 3 – Full Tilt Poker

Humming the tune of the Elvis great ‘suspicious minds’ will not distract me from by 2nd boldest prediction yet, dear Melted Felt readers. You see, I just do not think that Full Tilt are playing fair with your money. Yep, I’m predicting a financial scandal leading to the loss of their gaming license, the site going offline completely and a strong possibility that nobody will see their balances returned for the rest of the year.

I know I know, seems unbelievable – and you have not even heard my prediction about it getting bought out by a French bloke yet, or the DoJ being the one to hand US players back their money…

2011 Poker Predictions 4

That’s plenty enough ‘Big’ predictions for one year. Think I’ll come up with a few smaller ones, just to add flavour to this post and give other industry pundits a chance to poo-poo me!

Lock Poker will get knocked off their high-horses with a cheating scandal in 2011. Phil Ivey will miss the World Series (can’t decide whether this will be through illness, stubbornness or a very high level prop bet). Bodog will rebrand in the US and go completely anonymous at the tables. For some reason I see a u-turn coming from the government too – maybe the wire act will be declared as not applying to poker after all?


My main prediction in 2011 is that, however hard people try to talk up the celebrities, high stakes games and scandals – most of the ‘news’ will have been completely forgotten a week after it was published.

So, I’ll see you in a year’s time to see how things pan out.


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